Over the Moon
by Luinlothana
Summary: An impromptu trip inspired by Rose's idea leads to personal topics the Doctor never quite expected. Even though he probably should.
1. A Small Misstep

Disclaimer: BBC owns the rights to everything recognisable in connection to Doctor Who. And seeing how it includes even the Police not owning the rights to their phone boxes anymore, what is the chance that I could actually have rights to anything DW related?

Summary: An impromptu trip inspired by Rose's idea leads to topics the Doctor never quite expected. Even though he probably should. Meant to take place sometime after The Idiot's Lantern, so events up to that episode might be mentioned in passing.

A/N: This is one of a few stories I have written a few years ago and published elsewhere, under a different penname, intending for them to be a warm-up before taking part in a writing project and experimenting a bit with my writing style. The project never took off and I decided that it might be as good a time as any to decide to add those stories to the rest of them for convenience's sake if nothing else.

Over the Moon

A Small _Mis_ step

Rose sighed contentedly as she clung to her full shopping bags when she entered the TARDIS. Behind her trudged the Doctor, putting the 'Time Lords don't sulk' claim to very serious doubt.

"I just don't understand," she voiced closing the door.

"With you being a human, we might as well write it off as a genetic predisposition."

"Oi!"

"Right. What was it in particular that you found yourself not understanding?"

"You don't have to make it sound like that, you know. I just don't know how you can be this upset about coming here when it was _you_ who proposed the destination in the first place."

"What _I_ did, was say 'I can't believe you never had a puiuvi fruit, Rose. They are almost as good as bananas. Let's go get some. I know a really nice place where you can get great puiuvi smoothies too.' I most certainly did not suggest we hit the market afterwards so you can buy your weight in clothes."

"I didn't buy that much."

"Oh, yes, you did. And the fabrics on Krever are widely known for being delicate and very, very _light_."

"I needed some wardrobe change anyway."

He blinked as if the concept of wardrobe change was abstract to him. Then again, considering the only time she remembered him changing his style was as a result of his whole body changing first, it might have very well been.

"And _that_ was the reason you decided to equip yourself with a huge amount of clothes made of fabric that will have you freezing to death in about ninety percent of places we are likely to visit, _including_ London?"

"So you admit I will be able to wear them in the remaining ten percent of places?" she grinned him. "It's not like those were expensive anyway. Or are you worried we will run out of space in that wonderful, dimensionally transcendent wardrobe?"

She certainly knew how to corner him, the Doctor decided, as a melodic telepathic song let him know in no uncertain terms that the TARDIS would be listening to his response _very_ carefully. His girls teaming up against him was just unfair.

"Next stop," he grumbled avoiding the answer, "will be somewhere where the clothing shops don't cater to humans."

"Oi! How's that fair? Can't a girl buy herself a new thing or two?"

"Try couple dozen."

"It's not that bad."

"Precisely three and five sixth of a dozen."

" _Five sixth_?"

"Forty six items of clothing and a scarf."

Rose blinked. "How come you aren't counting the scarf?"

"Scarves are something else, trust me, I would know."

She looked at him doubtfully. "If you say so. And out of curiosity, you personally told me how humans spread among the stars. How exactly are you planning to find somewhere without air poisonous to me or humans being shot on sight where they won't have a few things for humans?"

"Rose, you disappoint me. Not only do you forget that the TARDIS can travel anywhen, but you even forget the technological level of _your own time_. No human colonies all over the space in twenty first century, remember? And we could go back to before any progress with space exploration, even Galileo, let alone the Moon landing." To his surprise, Rose sighed at that. "What?"

"Moon landing. Mum told me how exciting it was when it happened. She was just a kid but she still knew something big was going on. Even the toy choices changed from western style to space related. I wish I could be there, then, to see it all too."

"Well then, why didn't you say something? Let's go!"

"What happened to your plans of finding somewhere without humans?"

"The stop after that."

"Right," she allowed doubtfully, but he was already throwing some switches on the console.

A couple of minutes later, with one final shake, the TARDIS landed and Rose skipped to the door. While with the Doctor's track record one could never be completely sure they were in the right place, there still was some underlying expectation that he actually got it right. After all, he _did_ every, oh, two times out of three.

That was why Rose blinked confusedly when the opening the door revealed nothing. Well, perhaps _nothing_ wasn't the best way to put it. Still, bare rock stretching to the horizon, no movement, no life, no atmosphere, no nothing, was pushing it, even by their standards.

"Doctor, are you sure we're where we were supposed to be? This place looks rather on the empty side. I-" she broke off as she suddenly registered that up in the sky she could see something _very_ familiar. Perhaps not in the 'seen it like this often' sense, but still. The Doctor seemed not to notice her sudden muteness as he joined her in the door.

"Nah, seems about right. I just brought us a couple minutes early. Wouldn't do to have our arrival drawing attention. Especially with a well documented event like this."

"Nasty paradox?" she guessed.

"To say the least. No, don't step out. Footsteps take forever to disappear when there is no atmosphere and humans will soon be staring at the Moon surface looking for those. Not to mention, you don't want to annoy the TARDIS by forcing her to pointlessly extend her protective fields, do you?"

"Nope," she grinned in agreement. "No annoying the only being capable of still keeping you in check."

"Oi!" he protested before looking up. "Oh. There, Rose, see? There they are."

True to his word, the American landing module was slowly descending from the sky. Despite Rose knowing pretty well how it went, she still held her breath until it finally settled safely on the Moon surface.

"Wow," she whispered.

"Yes, pretty impressive for humans in this time, isn't it?"

"Oh come on, what is it with you and all those qualifiers?"

"Well, you have to admit, that's nothing compared to what humans do in, say, forty seventh century. And for once I don't mean cranberry chips. I still don't know why you like them so much."

"They are chips and they are pink. What's not to like? But that wasn't what I meant."

"What, you just like the idea of genetically hybridised potatoes?"

Rose glared. "Don't try to change the topic. You can go on for hours about how amazing that blue cat-thing playing with a ball of yarn was-"

"That was a tirgash."

"Whatever. But you feel obliged to point out it's impressive _for humans. In this time_."

"Well, you can't deny that the civilisations in the universe aren't all on the same level of development-"

"And I look pretty _for a human_ too, huh?"

He looked startled. "Why would-? Well, I'm sure you realise that every species has its own beauty canons. Even within species those change from time to time. Remember those looks your hair got when I took you to the premiere of Aristophanes's ' _Wasps_ '? So it speaks to reason that when one says someone is pretty, they refer to the standards of specific species."

She didn't answer, looking with strange determination to Armstrong and Aldrin. But when a sniff escaped her, she turned and walked quickly inside.

"Rose? Rose!" the Doctor tried calling after her as she crossed the console room and disappeared in the corridor. "What is it? Rose?"

She never even slowed down. He looked outside helplessly and then back to the corridor. If she didn't return, she'd miss most of what she wanted to see. Unless, of course, he put them outside of this timestream until he managed to resolve the situation. He sighed. The men outside were preoccupied and with no air the sound would hardly carry anyway. He closed the door, went to the console and started the dematerialisation sequence.

Outside, a wind-like dimensional disturbance shifted through the area, playing with the freshly planted flag.

TBC


	2. Finding Words

Disclaimer: BBC owns the rights to everything recognisable in connection to Doctor Who. And seeing how it includes even the Police not owning the rights to their phone boxes anymore, what is the chance that I could actually have rights to anything DW related? Additionally, a few poems in public domain for about a century already might have been mentioned in passing. I would appreciate the author not haunting me about it.

Summary: An impromptu trip inspired by Rose's idea leads to topics the Doctor never quite expected. Even though he probably should. Meant to take place sometime after The Idiot's Lantern, so events up to that episode might be mentioned in passing.

Over the Moon

Finding Words

As soon as they were in the Vortex, the Doctor went to look for Rose. She hadn't responded to his calls but the second knock on her room's door elicited a quiet "Go away." Honestly, she should have realised by now how good he was at _not_ listening to orders. Even if orders from pink-and-yellow human girls generally rated higher than those from intergalactic overlords.

"Rose? Can I come in?"

"Go away, _please_." Oh, she knew how to make it hard. Still, he had no intention of leaving his brilliant, inexplicably upset companion.

"Rose..."

"Go away, you insistent, rude alien!" Now, that was interesting. Unless he was very much mistaken, it was him she was upset with.

"Well, if you want to get technical, when you are on a ship, you are theoretically on the territory of the ship's port of origin. Seeing how the TARDIS is a Gallifreyan ship, that would make _you_ the alien, not me."

"Just go away, will you?"

"Now, I can't very well leave you when you're upset like that, can I?"

"I'm _not_ upset!" she proclaimed very unconvincingly and sniffed.

"Of course not," he agreed politely. "Just so you know, I'm not going anywhere. If you don't want me to come in, I'll stay right here, maybe read something to pass the time." He dug in his pockets for a moment. "This will do. I like Lermontov. Brilliant poet, pity about the duel. Do you like Lermontov, Rose?"

There was a sniff from behind the door, albeit a quieter one. When no other response came, he finally settled comfortably on the floor and started reading aloud.

" _It's Hell for us to draw the fetters  
Of life in alienation, stiff.  
All people prefer to share gladness,  
And nobody - to share grief._

As a king of air, I'm lone here,  
The pain lives in my heart, so grim,  
And I can see that, to the fear  
Of fate, years pass me by like dreams...

"

He stopped when the door cracked open to reveal puffy-eyed Rose. He frowned. He didn't like the idea of puffy-eyed Rose, especially not when he suspected he might have something to do with it.

"Why do you have to read things like this?" she asked as if she wasn't puffy-eyed and his literature choices were the most important topic at hand.

"What, poetry?" he asked reflexively.

"No, that thing you read. Why this?"

"I told you. I like Lermontov. I guess I read this page often and it just opened here."

"Let me see that book," she demanded, grabbing the item before he could even voice his consent and backing into her room with her 'catch'. Sensing the opportunity, he followed.

Taking in the state of the room, he thought that if he didn't know for a fact that the Golden Horde never made it inside the TARDIS, he would suspect they were doing some redecorating. In the meantime, Rose sat on her bed, opening the book on another worn page.

"Let's see – 'The Sail':  
 _By it a stream is bright as azure,  
By beams of sun it's warmed and blessed  
But it is seeking gales as treasure,  
As if the tempests give a rest._"

He felt he should be unsettled with the way her eyes seemed to penetrate him all of the sudden.

"What is it, Rose?"

"No, nothing, really."

"It can't be nothing. You were upset earlier, enough to leave and not see something you wanted to, and now you are set on discussing random bits of Russian poetry. If you ask me, that doesn't seem like _nothing_."

She kept leafing the book. "Seriously though, why do you choose to read things like that?"

"You aren't going to let go, are you?"

"Nope. Tell me," she pressed on and he closed his eyes for a second, taking the book from her hands and sitting next to her.

"Well, Lermontov was absolutely brilliant, you know. He really had his way with words." One look at her piercing gaze and he knew she wasn't satisfied with the answer. "And sometimes... Sometimes you want to find the words for what you feel. And if someone had found them before, you borrow them because they are readily available."

He looked down at the book as if he only now realised the page he opened it on.

"Now, Rose, this is a good one too, used to be my favourite once:  
 _I love my land, but with a queer passion,  
My mind isn't able to absorb it, yet!  
Nor glory, purchased by the bloody actions,  
Nor peace, in proud confidence inlaid,  
Nor sacred sagas of the days of yore  
Will stir my pleasant fancies any more.  
But I do love - and I don't know why -  
Her endless plains' indifference and silence,  
Her endless forests' ever swaying wildness,  
Her rivers' floods which, like the sea, are wide..._"

He broke off when the girl sniffed again, loudly.

"Sorry," she blushed, looking away. "I didn't mean to. It's great, really, only..."

"It doesn't matter, Rose. What does matter, though, is that you are upset."

"I'm not."

"I've been around humans long enough to be able to tell, you know. You were upset when you left earlier and you don't look particularly cheerful now."

"But... those were so beautiful and sad. And what I- it's stupid, really."

"Tell me anyway?" he offered.

"It's not important."

"Rose?"

She looked at her hands, her eyes still ridiculously puffy and bit her lip, saying nothing, only playing with the edge of her shirt.

"What is it, Rose?"

"She was wrong," the girl finally announced and sniffed again. All that sniffing was becoming ominous very quickly.

"Who?" he asked carefully.

"Mum. She said- it doesn't matter."

"She said that something didn't matter?"

She looked at him, apparently not impressed by his twisting of her words. Then she looked back down and fell silent. Reluctantly, needing to admit he might have chosen a wrong strategy, he pulled her closer. She stilled and then shook. And sniffed. Again.

"Rose?"

"When I left Jimmy... I thought that I had lost everything, you know."

Well, that was random. Who was Jimmy- wait, was that the name Rose mentioned talking with Mickey's living plastic double? Still, what _had_ he to do with anything?

"Yes?" he tried encouragingly, hoping his wonderful human would decide on making sense sometime soon.

"I mean, it seemed like I did. I left school because of him and he turned out to be... well, I couldn't live with a person like that. So there I was, all miserable, sitting at home and Mum said to me 'Don't worry about that idiot, Love. You'll find someone much better than him to fall in love with. You are smart and pretty, you could get any bloke you wanted.' And I believed her, you know. It sounds silly, but I did."

"Why would that be silly, Rose? That might be the smartest thing Jackie ever said."

"Well, I kind of did but I'm not, am I?" He would think the TARDIS's translation circuit started acting up randomly if it wasn't for the fact that she actually took the knowledge of languages from his mind so even if Rose _was_ talking some strange language, she should still be making more sense to him.

"You did what and are what?" he asked, just to make sure that the girl didn't lose ability to speak coherently due to some accident.

"That's the point. I'm not!" Or maybe she did after all?

"Rose, please, look at me and answer in full sentences. You are _not_ what?"

"Smart or pretty."

Now, that was neither a full sentence nor making sense. He was starting to seriously worry about her.

"Why would you think something like that?"

"Isn't that obvious?"

"Obvious? It's completely ridiculous, that's what it is. Where did you even get such an idea? You are brilliant." He paused for a moment, looking at her, sitting there, all puffy eyes, tangled hair, smeared makeup and bitten lip. Still, she qualified, despite doing her best not to. "And pretty."

"For a human," she added and turned away.

"Rose? Of course you are pretty by human standards. Which would you like me to use? You are too thin and not green enough to qualify as pretty by Slitheen ones, for example."

She snorted and sniffed again. This wasn't good.

"Rose?" he tried again. "What is it?"

"I was stupid," she announced as if that explained everything.

"Why do you say that?"

"I believed my Mum, yeah? I thought that maybe she was right and I could go, work in the shop, fall in love in whoever I wanted and I might be good enough no matter what."

"What's wrong with that?"

"What's wrong is that I did. Only it doesn't count."

What was she even talking about? Why didn't it count? Wait, no, when did Rose fall in love with someone? She never said anything. Shouldn't she have said something? And even if not, who could possibly... Not Mickey, not with the way she let him stay in the other universe. Only she didn't, did she? So could it be? But then again, wouldn't she have said something, after? And if she didn't want to, why would she say it now? Really, how come his wonderful human girl could be this confusing?

"Why not?" he asked finally, feeling that if he said nothing chances of her elaborating weren't very high.

"Well, I'm not, for you, am I?"

 _What_? The Doctor blinked. What did _he_ have to do with anything? What was she even talking about?

"You're not what, Rose?" he tried.

"Smart or pretty. I mean, the smart thing was a joke from the start where you are concerned. Next to you, even Einstein was a right dunce. But I was kind of hoping that I was at least still pretty enough to stand a chance, not just a comic relief tagging along."

"You were never a comic relief, Rose. And you _are_ smart. As a matter of fact, I think you are brilliant."

"For a human."

"Stop that."

"Why? That's what you think anyway, isn't it? And if I thought I could ever stand a chance, I can't be very smart anyway, can I?"

"That you could stand a chance? Rose, what are you talking abou- Hold on, you said... a moment ago, you said you were in love with someone?"

"I-" Rose paled immediately which, paired with the puffy eyes and all the rest, made a rather peculiar sight.

"You did, didn't you? But you said it didn't count. Why wouldn't it count, Rose?"

"I-" the girl said again, but once he was starting to connect the facts, there were very few things that could stop him. Although the pleading look she sent him right there and then came very close to being one of those.

"But instead of telling me that, you went on about how it didn't matter _where I was concerned_. Why would it need to matter to me? It wouldn't, would it, not unless-"

That was the moment when the conclusion he was coming to dawned on him.

"Rose? You didn't mean me, did you?"

Her response came in form of glassy eyes looking straight at him with vulnerability he never even suspected Rose of being capable of. He wondered how he should handle that. But whatever would the right way be, searching for it was apparently a bad choice, as after a moment of silence she looked away.

"Doesn't matter, does it? I could never be smart enough next to you and if I'm pretty, it's only by human standards."

And with that, she got up and ran out of her room. He blinked in her wake, wondering how a pleasant day that started with laughing over puiuvi smoothies could spiral out of control this fast. And yes, he did mean even by his standards.

Not coming up with any plausible answer, he stood up and went to look for his, no matter what she said, brilliant human.

TBC


	3. Zigzagging to Conclusion

Disclaimer: BBC owns the rights to everything recognisable in connection to Doctor Who. And seeing how it includes even the Police not owning the rights to their phone boxes anymore, what is the chance that I could actually have rights to anything DW related?

Summary: An impromptu trip inspired by Rose's idea leads to topics the Doctor never quite expected. Even though he probably should. Meant to take place sometime after The Idiot's Lantern, so events up to that episode might be mentioned in passing.

Over the Moon

Zigzagging to Conclusion

Finding Rose wasn't, on the whole, particularly difficult. Even with the TARDIS letting him know exactly what she thought of him upsetting _their_ Rose, she still wasn't so far gone as to refuse the Time Lord bonded with her the information on what was going on inside her.

Soon enough, he walked into the galley to be met with the sight of his favourite human apparently attempting to stab the ice cream to death with a spoon. He approached cautiously, which had absolutely _nothing_ to do with the fact that the last time he had seen her become violent, she vaporised the entire Dalek fleet.

"Ice cream trouble?" he asked in a tone suggesting that such trouble was of the most commonly found kind.

As soon as she heard him speak, Rose swirled around, wielding her spoon like a weapon. What's worse, she got more puffy-eyed than she was before. This definitely wasn't good.

Seeing how he firmly believed that resolving any matter over drawn weapons, spoons or not, wasn't very productive, he strode to her, took the offending item from her hand, used the sonic screwdriver to soften the ice cream and scooped a good amount into a bowl. Then, adding a splash of raspberry syrup for good measure, he handed the bowl to Rose as a peace offering.

She took it, snatched her spoon from him and retreated to the table looking offended. Not letting that discourage him, he followed and took the seat beside her.

"Rose?"

"Mnpht," she responded with a spoonful of ice cream in her mouth, the spoon still there. He wondered if she would be offended if he asked the TARDIS to record that image of her. Still, it was time to try to move forward in resolving the upset Rose issue.

He dug in his pockets again, vaguely remembering where to find what he was looking for. After two minutes and a small pile of items placed on the table before him, he became aware of the doubtful look the girl was giving him. That was when his fingers finally closed on what he was looking for.

Rose looked as the Doctor's face suddenly lit with a triumphant expression as he fished out a small metal case. She was half-expecting it would join the rest of the items (and what _was_ he doing with a lava lamp in his pocket anyway?), when he opened it and started looking though photos he had inside, finally selecting two and handing them to her.

Each photo was of a woman, neither of whom did she recognise – one with dark locks, smiling mysteriously straight at the camera, the other slightly younger, blonde, looking up mischievously from a book.

"They're pretty," she offered, not really knowing what to make of all this.

" _She_ was pretty," he corrected immediately. "Same person, Rose, just two different regenerations."

"You mean she was..."

"A Time Lady, yes. And a good friend. Her name was Romanadvoratrelundar."

Rose tried mouthing that for a moment. "If that's what names were like for you, I no longer wonder why you're not using yours."

"Oh, it's much more complicated than that. And friends called her Romana anyway. That's not why I'm showing you her photos, though."

"Why then?"

"Before, you seemed to think that Time Ladies looked- well, I don't know what you thought exactly but you definitely thought that human standards of beauty wouldn't apply to them and vice versa. I thought I would let you know that wasn't the case before we went any further in this discussion."

She looked back to her ice cream, not lifting her gaze. "But you said 'for a human'. From the very start. If it didn't matter to you, why would you say that?"

"You mean, why would I _add_ that, being practically a stranger to you, centuries older and basically your only way of returning home? I don't know, tell me Rose, why might have I thought it wouldn't be a good idea to start complimenting the looks of a girl who only just trusted me, knew next to nothing about me and depended on me at that moment?"

She blinked. Took another spoonful of ice cream into her mouth and blinked again.

"So you were trying not to let me get the wrong idea?" He almost confirmed that before she continued. "That you liked me?"

"Oh, Rose, of course I like you. That has absolutely nothing to do with it."

"All right, maybe not in the _like_ like sense. But you know what I meant." She focused on her ice cream for a moment. "Only I should have known better than think you could actually love a stupid human like me."

"How many times do I have to tell you? You are not stupid. You, Rose Tyler, are brilliant."

"For a human. Human with no A levels."

"Not just for a human. And what do A levels have to do with anything? If you want to have them so much, we can have you sit them during one of our stops in London. I can even tutor you if you like, would be a good idea to make sure your school knowledge isn't stuck in twenty first century. But only people like that idiot Adam need a paper to tell them they are smart."

She snorted with the spoon in her mouth and shot him a betrayed look as she coughed a few times, apparently being attacked by the ice cream.

"I didn't really like him all that much, you know," she confessed.

"Could have fooled me. With you inviting him to travel with us and all..."

"If you must know, he made me feel so worthless, having that high IQ and all the diplomas. There I was, surrounded by people hand-picked for their genius, without even finishing school. You wouldn't believe how intimidated I felt."

"Intimidated? Rose, he couldn't tell a hair dryer apart from a weapon!"

"Really?" she looked at him curiously. "Anyway, I felt a little better when he started telling me how there is life on other planets and all. It wasn't much, but knowing something he didn't helped a bit. But still, with him informing me of everything, I felt so inferior and I thought how I never felt like that with you, despite you being loads smarter than him. So when everything was over and he came down to warn us, I thought that maybe if he came with us and spent some time around you, he would stop acting as if he was the smartest bloke around and actually start being normal."

"You wanted him to travel with us so I could show him up?" the Doctor asked bewildered.

"I don't think I saw it like that, then. If anything, I thought he might be good company to have around once he got over himself. If I had any idea what he would try to do, I would have never suggested that, I swear."

"And that's what makes you so wonderful, Rose. It would never even occur to you that someone could try to take advantage of travelling with me to line their own pockets."

"Still, sorry about that. I vouched for him, kind of."

"It's me who should have known better. It's just that I have this little problem with refusing you."

"You _what_?"

"Oh, don't tell me you haven't noticed. Bringing Adam with us, double-layered crossing your own timeline, waking too soon after regeneration, bets that annoy heads of state, taking Mickey in-"

" _What_?" she cut in suddenly. "Since when have I had anything to do with that?"

"Well, it was pretty obvious, Rose. I offered to let him come earlier, you know, after the whole Slitheen trouble and he said no. He never said anything about changing his mind when he met with us. And then, you are suddenly gossiping with Sarah Jane and whispering with Mickey in that chippy and the next thing I know Sarah Jane basically hands her spot over to him and he says yes."

She was looking at him strangely. "You thought that I _arranged it_?"

"Maybe not exactly the way it went but it's generally not hard to figure out. Still, you wanted him, so I brought him with us. Even tried to give the two of you some space while at it."

" _That_ was why you acted like that on that spaceship? I thought you- Never mind."

"What else could you think? Honestly."

Rose opened her mouth, then closed it without voicing anything and focused back on her ice cream. Silence stretched between them and the Doctor could only hope she'd stop ignoring him once she finished eating.

After a moment she spoke again, not looking at him.

"None of it matters, does it? You said all those nice things but they don't matter, do they?"

"Of course they matter. Why wouldn't they matter?"

"You never said anything. You changed the topic and said all that stuff but..."

"Hold on, Rose. What didn't I say?"

She looked at him and her look suggested that unless he did something very quickly, he would need to deal with even-more-puffy-eyed-Rose. That wouldn't be good. Even-more-puffy-eyed-Rose, that is. Not wanting to face that eventuality, he did a quick assessment of their whole interaction. In the process of concluding that pink-and-yellow human girls must be among the most confusing creatures in existence, he realised there _was_ one thing that still needed to be addressed.

"You never answered me, you know," he told her in what he hoped was a casual manner. She blinked at him, which, as far as he was concerned, wasn't a particularly elaborate reply. "When I asked if you meant me, you never said anything."

"It doesn't matter, does it? I'm just a stupid human and you don't see me like that, so what's the point?"

"Oh, Rose," he pulled her into a hug just as she started sniffing again. Then he took a moment to think of how to actually respond to what she implied. "The way I see you... You are brilliant. And wonderful. Brilliantly wonderful. Wonderfully brilliant, even. And amazing. Yes, definitely amazing."

At that point the Doctor risked a glance at her. There was something of a hopeful look in her eyes but it was disappearing fast, giving room to hurt. Why would Rose have a hurt look about her? Rose was supposed to be happy. Always. Because she was _Rose_ and the universe was a decidedly better place with a happy Rose in it.

"Still, you're not saying it, are you?" she looked down for a second before suddenly looking up with strange determination on her face. "I- I do love you, you know," she whispered in a volume that would be inaudible for about sixty percent of sentient life forms. Well, forty five if you counted only those able to hear in the first place. Still. "But you don't, do you?"

He looked at her. Opened his mouth. Closed it. Pulled her a little closer, just in case she was considering taking off after the revelation again. Noticed how her hair smelled a bit stronger of strawberries when she moved her head. And it mixed with the raspberry scent from the syrup. Took an unnecessary breath analysing the smell, which was when he realised he was stalling.

"Rose-" he managed and stopped, unsure what he was supposed to say. "You could do so much better than me," he added, but that was apparently a wrong thing to mention, as she sniffed again. He was quite certain that, in theory, his earlier assurances were supposed to improve her mood somewhat. Definitely not cause that hopeless look in her eyes.

He looked down.

"I forgot," he confessed quietly.

"Forgot?" she asked, sounding all confused for some reason. "Forgot what, Doctor?"

"How to do it. It's been so long and with everything that happened since..."

"How could you forget?"

She stared at him as if he grew another head. Well, if you squinted, you could probably say that he did, in a sense, when he regenerated, but he doubted her reaction would be _this_ delayed.

"Rose..."

" _How_ can you not remember? I mean, you know what you feel, yeah, so if you felt it, you would know what it was," she argued before getting the upset look again. "You must have simply not felt it yet. But I'm sure you will, someday, just not for a silly human hoping for something-"

"No," he stated firmly, interrupting her, because he simply couldn't look at her doing that to herself. "It doesn't work like that, Rose."

She blinked at him. Well, it was something, he guessed.

"Feeling that for someone, it's complex, you know. It's all those small things you put together that amount to you realising that you..."

"Love someone?" she guessed when he found himself having trouble voicing it. He could talk, could always talk, especially in this regeneration, but give him temporal physics and quantum mechanics over feelings any day.

"Yes, that. Oh, I know there were those things that counted in the process. But how to put them together? The whole thing just got lost somewhere. I suppose I never really expected to have much use of it, anyway."

"You didn't expect to ever love anyone again?" the fact that her expression shifted from upset to horrified probably wasn't an improvement.

"I never expected to get close to anyone ever again. Of course, then I needed to go and save that human girl in the shop basement who had other ideas."

She beamed at him. Now _that_ definitely _was_ an improvement.

"Oh, you did, did you?"

"Yes, persistent creature, she was. Even without being there. She told me no, you see. And I went away, tried to go back to being alone and couldn't get her out of my mind. Had no choice but to eventually go back and ask her again."

She kept smiling, but looked thoughtful. "I did wonder. You aren't usually one to change your mind so fast. And you left and returned in about half a minute."

"Half a decade," he corrected, seeing her mouth falling open. "But I had to land close to where and when I left, in order to find you, didn't I?"

"You went away for a couple of _years_ before you came back for me?" she repeated disbelievingly.

"What's a year or two to a Time Lord?" he asked rhetorically. "I was respecting your decision. You seemed like someone who knew what they wanted. I tried to get busy and forget about you, I really did. Uncovered an alien conspiracy that wanted to kill off all the Kennedy children just because they thought that their father was a traitor they were looking for..."

"Really?" she frowned, remembering something. "There _was_ a picture of you in the crowd when JFK was shot."

"Long story. What I'm trying to say is, you, Rose Tyler, proved to be completely unforgettable. Had to go back for you because I was going crazy without you."

"But you knew me for just what, two days?"

"Two days is more than enough. Trust me."

She took the spoon and started drawing shapes in the now empty bowl.

"Unforgettable, huh?" she finally voiced.

"Oh, definitely. Unforgettable, that's you, Rose. And Brilliant. Can't forget brilliant. Brilliant and unforgettable." She blushed. It suited her, he decided. "And we should probably steer clear of the Trojan War. Can't have them deciding not to bother with Helen, can we? Wouldn't want to be the one fixing _that_ paradox."

She blushed harder.

"You mean that?" she finally asked.

"Of course I mean that. When was the last time I said something I didn't mean?"

"You said Mum's cake tasted nice."

"Aside from that."

She smirked. "Picky, aren't you?"

They grinned at each other before the Doctor grew more serious again.

"I did mean everything I said, Rose. I think the world of you. And I can't stand being without you. I don't _want_ to be without you and I don't even want to think about needing to, someday. Not to mention, I would do anything for you. But that's all I can offer. I wish I still knew how to love someone – you – but I'm not sure that part of me still exists."

"I think it does," she spoke after a moment. "Maybe it's buried somewhere deep but it doesn't seem like something that can simply get lost. We'll just have to figure out how to find it, yeah?"

"I'm not sure it's possible."

"Well, with that attitude you won't get far, that's for sure. All we need to do is keep trying," she told him.

And then she snogged him.

Silently, he had to admit to himself that he definitely could live with her approach to the matter. Though the fact that she broke off after a while wasn't very nice. Why couldn't humans have a respiratory bypass? Speaking of, he'd need to take a good look at human genome. Now that he was reminded of how impossible to stand the lack of Rose was, it would be sensible to make sure she was around for as long as possible. Maybe alteration in the biological current on cellular level, tweaking the telomeres- After taking a deep breath Rose resumed the snogging and he resolved to think about everything else later.

A while later, a much happier Rose was rinsing her ice cream bowl when he realised they had forgotten something.

"Rose? Do you want to watch the rest of the Moon landing?"

The End


End file.
